The last time I was here at Sara and Ian's house in Hallowell, Maine was Monday, August 26. I remember that day after our ten day summer stay. Doug went off to fish on the river. He always has to get in a "one more time". Our flight on Cape Air left from Augusta to Boston at 2pm so there was time. Sara had to return to work and Ian would escort us with our bags. But as Doug went for his "one more time" I did too. I walked up the street to Vaughn Woods. This is a beautiful park with hiking trails and creek. As I walked there were a few lefts and rights and not knowing the park well I was not sure where I was going. The next fellow who ended up on my path became my direction guide. I asked a few questions and he said, "well I need to turn around any way so I will walk with you and show you". Seemed fine to me. As we walked I learned that he had grown up not far from the park. He was maybe a little older than I and talkative and friendly. He reminisced about other times in Hallowell and told me some of the history of the Kennebec River when there was no consciousness about the destructive nature of chemicals and pollution. The river was dying and the community rose up and the factories and lumber industry had to clean it up. Now after many years it is in a pretty healthy state but it is still not recommended to eat any fish. It was a wonderful walk and chance encounter with a local. Doug had a great fishing morning and I had my walk so we were ready to head home with our memories of fun times in Maine with Sara and Ian and a plan for me to return in January when their babycake was to arrive.
We were home in Livermore at about 10pm that night. The next day was to be a hot one so I went for a walk with "Jack" early. Still filled with good feelings and happy memories of our trip out east Jack and I ventured on our regular route. About half way through my life suddenly changed. A simple crack in the sidewalk concrete had bulged up about 1 1/2 inches or so, not much, right in front of my right foot. I did not see it but my foot met it, tripping me. I can remember those very few moments or it was just a second or so when I was precariously going in the wrong direction, down. I thought about breaking my fall but saw there was no way to do that and boom I landed on my right side. It felt like a hard fall but it did not hurt. I just instantly realized it was not good. I said quite loudly, "Ow, Ow, Ow!" I had let go of Jack and as I rolled onto my back I reached for his leash and my phone which also had fallen. After a quick assessment I knew that I was not getting up on my own. I was not sure what happened but something did. Instantly I called Doug, "I fell on my walk. I need you, come and get me. I probably broke my leg." I gave him directions on how to find me lying on the ground a bit hidden by landscaping on either side of the sidewalk. Not to labor with too much detail about this incident I was rescued by Doug and the paramedics who lifted me gingerly with a scooper onto a stretcher and into the ambulance. I love paramedics, just saying.
Keenly aware that I could not move and would not move it was obvious this was not a simple break. At the hospital I was xrayed and examined. I met the orthopedic surgeon on call that morning. He told me I had "broken my hip"! Really? Well then, since I can not move, and please do not make me move, what are you going to do about that? Since I broke the ball on top of my femur he decided the best course of action was to replace it. Oh sure just take it will you please and get me back to my healthy state of being so I can walk again. I was ready for this plan to happen. It must have been some of the drugs, but I just knew I had to do what ever had to be done to get to the other side and no resistance was the best policy to get there.
That was over 4 months ago now. I have had a major surgery, half hip replacement and am at least 92% recovered. There is more to go. Must say that percentage estimate changes from day to day. Some days are better than others. But I can go for walks again. I am walking again in Maine on the same streets but now with a reconstructed leg part and in a different season. It was beautiful here then and it is beautiful here now.
This garden is up the road as it was in Summer and is now in Winter....I noticed the two chairs have not moved. The seasons have changed but they are still there inviting you to sit for a while. Isn't that what we learn when big change happens? Or is it what we are supposed to learn?
We were home in Livermore at about 10pm that night. The next day was to be a hot one so I went for a walk with "Jack" early. Still filled with good feelings and happy memories of our trip out east Jack and I ventured on our regular route. About half way through my life suddenly changed. A simple crack in the sidewalk concrete had bulged up about 1 1/2 inches or so, not much, right in front of my right foot. I did not see it but my foot met it, tripping me. I can remember those very few moments or it was just a second or so when I was precariously going in the wrong direction, down. I thought about breaking my fall but saw there was no way to do that and boom I landed on my right side. It felt like a hard fall but it did not hurt. I just instantly realized it was not good. I said quite loudly, "Ow, Ow, Ow!" I had let go of Jack and as I rolled onto my back I reached for his leash and my phone which also had fallen. After a quick assessment I knew that I was not getting up on my own. I was not sure what happened but something did. Instantly I called Doug, "I fell on my walk. I need you, come and get me. I probably broke my leg." I gave him directions on how to find me lying on the ground a bit hidden by landscaping on either side of the sidewalk. Not to labor with too much detail about this incident I was rescued by Doug and the paramedics who lifted me gingerly with a scooper onto a stretcher and into the ambulance. I love paramedics, just saying.
Keenly aware that I could not move and would not move it was obvious this was not a simple break. At the hospital I was xrayed and examined. I met the orthopedic surgeon on call that morning. He told me I had "broken my hip"! Really? Well then, since I can not move, and please do not make me move, what are you going to do about that? Since I broke the ball on top of my femur he decided the best course of action was to replace it. Oh sure just take it will you please and get me back to my healthy state of being so I can walk again. I was ready for this plan to happen. It must have been some of the drugs, but I just knew I had to do what ever had to be done to get to the other side and no resistance was the best policy to get there.
That was over 4 months ago now. I have had a major surgery, half hip replacement and am at least 92% recovered. There is more to go. Must say that percentage estimate changes from day to day. Some days are better than others. But I can go for walks again. I am walking again in Maine on the same streets but now with a reconstructed leg part and in a different season. It was beautiful here then and it is beautiful here now.
This garden is up the road as it was in Summer and is now in Winter....I noticed the two chairs have not moved. The seasons have changed but they are still there inviting you to sit for a while. Isn't that what we learn when big change happens? Or is it what we are supposed to learn?
What if we just sit in our chairs as change happens? As summer gives way to autumn and then to winter and we just simply watch. As we experience change in our lives in so many ways including breaking our hip. We know that change is inevitable. Some change we can expect and know it is coming. Some change we do not know. It just happens. How do we respond? Do we run around trying to make it stop? Sometimes we do, we have to, it is all too painful or it is so desirable we want it to go on for ever. But this is what nature teaches us, summer will always become autumn and then winter and then spring and then summer. We can participate in its appreciation and have a tall cool one sitting in the chair in the summer or a warm steamy one in the winter. Peaceful acceptance of our life no matter what we are presented with requires taking the seat. Not a choice we many times take willingly, sometimes we are forced to sit but if we do just quiet ourselves for a few moments and watch, we can learn.
Hmmmm last time I was here I was me and then now I am me too, even though a lot has happened in between. Yes, something to contemplate. Not sure of the realization I should have but I am happy I am still here even though I changed in a way I never expected when last here. I appreciate the great good fortune of my life to have good medical care and a loving husband to get me through. Love those chairs up the street. I hope they are there when I come again in the Spring.
I am so glad that there are two chairs in that garden because life is so much better when you observe and participate and appreciate with someone else, a friend, a partner, a daughter, a son in law or I can not wait, a grandchild.
Hmmmm last time I was here I was me and then now I am me too, even though a lot has happened in between. Yes, something to contemplate. Not sure of the realization I should have but I am happy I am still here even though I changed in a way I never expected when last here. I appreciate the great good fortune of my life to have good medical care and a loving husband to get me through. Love those chairs up the street. I hope they are there when I come again in the Spring.
I am so glad that there are two chairs in that garden because life is so much better when you observe and participate and appreciate with someone else, a friend, a partner, a daughter, a son in law or I can not wait, a grandchild.
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